I.....I'm getting a new girl
I.....I'm really digging my new girl
I couldn't afford one made out of flesh
But I think my new girl, she's the best
Now you know, I'm really not one to brag
I wish I could wave her like an American flag

I take my girl to work with me
I let her hold my seat on the bus
No one's gonna sit down next to me
No one's gonna put up a fuss

I.....I'm getting a new girl
I.....I'm really digging my new girl
Thanks to my girl I can go to the shopping mall
But without my girl I can't do nothing at all
So much fun when I go on an airplane
Drives the security guards completely insane

My girl don't mind if I travel incognito
Or out by the pool just me and my speedo

I.....I'm getting a new girl
I.....I'm really digging my new girl
Even The Fonz thinks my new girl is cool (aaaay)
Alice Cooper told me he'd take her to school
My girl's tougher than a dinosaur's hide
When she fought Hulk Hogan she done made him cry

'Cause she's my girl
I'm getting a new girl
I'm getting a new girl (repeat)